I had a boss who was difficult and had some weird habits.
I wished for a better boss.
Then him and the secretary ran off together, and we got a new boss.
OK, so the new boss refuses to speak English, because he doesn't like English speakers.
So how bad can that be? Oh, I see: we are not allowed to speak English either.
That kinda sucks when we don't know any other language! It turns out the staff have turns being in trouble.
It's not that you did anything wrong.
In fact, you may have worked your tail off the whole week.
It's just your turn to be picked on, and given the worst jobs, and be implicated in all the mistakes made by others.
This would be hilarious if our minds could absorb the totally illogical.
Apparently his wife is fighting with him, and he can't win there, so he takes it out on the first guy he sees at work who looks even vaguely happy.
Anybody else out there have these problems? Apparently it's quite common.
What must happen, is that when a normal, average guy gets promoted to a manager, covert forces arrive in the dead of night and spirit him away, then perform a frontal lobotomy, to remove any unwanted intelligence.
He is then implanted with a logic blocking device, to prevent facts getting in the way of his decisions.
He is then quietly returned to his bed, and wakes up none the wiser.
In fact, a whole lot less wiser.
He can then toddle off to work and make random and catastrophic decisions without being diverted by reason or, horror of horrors, Common Sense!! Common sense is the mortal enemy of a manager.
Workers who use it on their manager overload his logic blocking device, causing violent outbursts and fits of sulking.
So if you ever become a manager, don't sleep in your bed! Put a crash test chummy in your place, and just hope your wife doesn't get to like him more than she likes you! As soon as you see the telltale incision in the crash test chummy's head, you will know it is safe to sleep in your own bed again.
That's if your wife still wants you! Duncan Kelly
I wished for a better boss.
Then him and the secretary ran off together, and we got a new boss.
OK, so the new boss refuses to speak English, because he doesn't like English speakers.
So how bad can that be? Oh, I see: we are not allowed to speak English either.
That kinda sucks when we don't know any other language! It turns out the staff have turns being in trouble.
It's not that you did anything wrong.
In fact, you may have worked your tail off the whole week.
It's just your turn to be picked on, and given the worst jobs, and be implicated in all the mistakes made by others.
This would be hilarious if our minds could absorb the totally illogical.
Apparently his wife is fighting with him, and he can't win there, so he takes it out on the first guy he sees at work who looks even vaguely happy.
Anybody else out there have these problems? Apparently it's quite common.
What must happen, is that when a normal, average guy gets promoted to a manager, covert forces arrive in the dead of night and spirit him away, then perform a frontal lobotomy, to remove any unwanted intelligence.
He is then implanted with a logic blocking device, to prevent facts getting in the way of his decisions.
He is then quietly returned to his bed, and wakes up none the wiser.
In fact, a whole lot less wiser.
He can then toddle off to work and make random and catastrophic decisions without being diverted by reason or, horror of horrors, Common Sense!! Common sense is the mortal enemy of a manager.
Workers who use it on their manager overload his logic blocking device, causing violent outbursts and fits of sulking.
So if you ever become a manager, don't sleep in your bed! Put a crash test chummy in your place, and just hope your wife doesn't get to like him more than she likes you! As soon as you see the telltale incision in the crash test chummy's head, you will know it is safe to sleep in your own bed again.
That's if your wife still wants you! Duncan Kelly
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