Are you the victim of an affair? Is your spouse / partner still having an affair even as you read this? After the affair, knowing what to do is very hard. After all, it is not an every day discovery, is it?

Finding out that your spouse or partner is cheating on you is an extremely difficult thing to have to discover, and the need to confront your partner with what you know and have found out becomes evident.

How is it possible to put your devastation on the side lines to ask them straight out about it? Are you even prepared to hear your spouses side of the story? You need to really think hard about whether or not you are ready or can handle hearing the truth about your spouses infidelities before you go asking for it. You don't want to wind up in a fit of rage over it.

But, if you want to stay married, you will have to grit your teeth and bear some kind of confrontation. You could first start by telling them what you already know, then proceed in asking them if it (the affair) is still happening or if it is over.

If it is still happening, you need to ask your partner to end it immediately. If on the other hand it has ended or was just a one off single time, then you need to ask your partner to promise that it won't happen again. If they can do that, you have a very good chance of rebuilding the trust and getting over the infidelity.